Kerry's Komedy Klub

[Katie77]

MY PRIVATE PART DIED

An old man, Mr. Wallace, was living in a nursing home.

One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed.

Nurse Tracy asked him if there was anything wrong,

'Yes, Nurse Tracy ,' said Mr. Wallace.

'My Private Part died today, and I am very sad.'

Knowing her patients were a little forgetful and sometimes a little crazy,
she replied, 'Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Wallace. Please accept my condolences.'

The following day, Mr. Wallace was walking down the hall with his Private Part
hanging out of his pajamas.

He met Nurse Tracy. 'Mr. Wallace,' she said,
'You shouldn't be walking down the hall like that.

Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas.'

'But, Nurse Tracy I can't,' replied Mr. Wallace.
'I told you yesterday that my Private Part died.

'Yes,' said Nurse Tracy, 'you did tell me that,
but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?'

(You've gotta love this .)

'Well,' he replied, 'Today is the viewing.'

[Kerry]

[Penthesilea]

Hey Kerry and all,

I don't know why on earth I never commented on this 280 pages long thread - but I read here regularly. Love it!
And in my next life, I'm so gonna be a bear!

[Kerry]

Hey Kerry and all,

I don't know why on earth I never commented on this 280 pages long thread - but I read here regularly. Love it!
And in my next life, I'm so gonna be a bear!

I'm so glad you enjoy the Komedy Klub and that you visit regularly. Please feel free to post your funnies here, too. No matter what they are - jokes, cartoons, funny pics - post them all here at the Komedy Klub, for us all to enjoy. Everyone is very welcome to post their funnies here. 

[Kerry]

[Katie77]

Some clever and funny advertising on the side of vending machines.....

[Penthesilea]

 

Those vending machine ads are just so clever and funny. Loved them Sue

[Katie77]

Glad you enjoy all the funnies here Penthesilea.....

Heres one that gave me a good belly laugh.....


Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I
know why they record these conversations!):

Operator:         'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
Caller:              'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
Operator:         'What sort of trouble??'
Caller:              'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the
words went away.'
Operator:         'Went away?'
Caller:              'They disappeared.'
Operator:         'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller:              'Nothing.'
Operator:         'Nothing??'
Caller:              'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
Operator:         'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'
Caller:              'How do I tell?'
Operator:         'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'
Caller:              'What's a sea-prompt?'
Operator:         'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
Caller:              'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept
anything I type.'
Operator:         'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
Caller:              'What's a monitor?'
Operator:         'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a
TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??'
Caller:               'I don't know.'
Operator:          'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'
Caller:              'Yes, I think so.'
Operator:         'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
plugged into the wall.
Caller:              'Yes, it is.'
Operator:         'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that
there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??'
Caller:               'No.'
Operator:          'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and
find the other cable.'
Caller:               'Okay, here it is.'
Operator:          'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely
into the back of your computer.'
Caller:               'I can't reach.'
Operator:          'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??'
Caller:               'No.'
Operator:          'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean
way over??'
Caller:               'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle -
it's because it's dark.'
Operator:          'Dark??'
Caller:               'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I
have is coming in from the window.
' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'
Caller:               'I can't.'
Operator:          'No? Why not??'
Caller:               'Because there's a power failure.'
Operator:  'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked
now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came
in??'
Caller:               'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'
Operator:           'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it
up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you
bought it from.'
Caller:                'Really? Is it that bad?'
Operator:            'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
Caller:                 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell
them??'
Operator:            'Tell them you're too f --- ing stupid to own a
computer!!!!!'

[Kerry]

 

  Hello, gorgeous!     



(P.S., It's a cushion!)     

[Katie77]

OMG...........